it's worth waiting for.

This is one of several letters I wrote to give to my future husband on our wedding day. I'd just like to share it as an encouragement to those who are also in the season of waiting. June 9, 2007 (2:38 AM) Dearest, By the time you read this, you and I would have met, learned to love each other, and promised to belong together for the rest of our lives. I would have memorized everything about you — your face, your voice, your touch. And you would … Read More

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I’m your someone.

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Ever made by the Hand above?

A woman’s heart, and a woman’s life—

And a woman’s wonderful love.

Do you know you have asked for this priceless thing

As a child might ask for a toy?

Demanding what others have died to win,

With the reckless dash of a boy.

You have written my lesson of duty out,

Manlike, you have questioned me.

Now stand at the bars of my woman’s soul

Until I shall question thee.

You require your mutton shall always be hot,

Your socks and your shirt be whole;

I require your heart be true as God’s stars

And as pure as His heaven your soul.

You require a cook for your mutton and beef,

I require a far greater thing;

A seamstress you’re wanting for socks and shirts—

I look for a man and a king.

A king for the beautiful realm called Home,

And a man that his Maker, God,

Shall look upon as He did on the first

And say: “It is very good.”

I am fair and young, but the rose may fade

From this soft young cheek one day;

Will you love me then ‘mid the falling leaves,

As you did ‘mong the blossoms of May?

Is your heart an ocean so strong and true,

I may launch my all on its tide?

A loving woman finds heaven or hell

On the day she is made a bride.

I require all things that are grand and true,

All things that a man should be;

If you give this all, I would stake my life

To be all you demand of me.

If you cannot be this, a laundress and cook

You can hire and little to pay;

But a woman’s heart and a woman’s life

Are not to be won that way.”

— Joshua Harris (I Kissed Dating Goodbye)

As I’ve mentioned before, religion has an unfortunate history of treating sex as something dirty and shameful. Even now, those of us who advocate purity must carefully guard against legalism.

Then there’s the other extreme—a “liberated” mentality in which anything goes and all modesty is lost. When society allows the pendulum to swing in this direction, the results are incredibly destructive.

I don’t want to be like a pendulum. I don’t want to react (and overreact) to the problems I see around me. There’s another way, and another symbol: the plumb line.

A plumb line is a pointed weight on the end of a string. This tool produces a straight line every time—gravity ensures it. The Lord Himself used the plumb line as a symbol of His perfect, unchanging standards.

When it comes to sex, God’s “plumb line” runs consistently through the Bible. It begins in Genesis 2:24, where He describes the beautiful, mysterious “one flesh” union between husband and wife. Jesus quoted this very passage when teaching about marital fidelity (Matthew 19:5). Paul quoted it in making his case against sexual promiscuity (1 Corinthians 6:16). God designed sex to be experienced only within marriage–His mind hasn’t changed.

I pray that we will act as plumb lines, not pendulums. Let’s continue to present God’s standard: no more, no less.

* Read more of Kuya Kevin’s articles in KuyaKevin.com: Real Relationship Advice

Batch 2 (February 23, 2009)